Jitters mean feelings of extreme nervousness. Pre wedding jitters are the wedding nerves, cold feet, or premarital doubts. If you are restless about your forthcoming wedding, having awful dreams, feeling like you’ve made a mistake by saying yes to marriage then you’re suffering from pre wedding jitters. It’s basically your subconscious, letting you know that something isn’t right and you must hear to it. Pre wedding jitters doesn’t mean that it’s time to call off wedding instead it means that there is something making you anxious and you need to understand it. If you don’t pay attention to your subconscious it can result in anxiety, sleeping sickness, illness etc.
There might be many reasons for this, some of them I’m listing here that might help you to understand your real cause of jitters.
Becoming a “wife” or “husband.”
It may happen that the bride or groom is not mentally ready for the lifetime commitment and agreed to marriage because of the family pressure.
The bride or groom may have doubts about their upcoming life partners as to whether he/she would prove perfect just as he/she has idealized.
Bride/groom may have doubts about themselves as to if they are ready for the commitment and will they be able to make it through. What if it didn’t work or broke off.
Broken families background can be the real cause. If bride/groom has witnessed wrong blueprints throughout their life, if they’ve witnessed that it’s fine to abuse your partner, to fight, to call names then the bride/groom may fear that their forthcoming wedding may turn up the way they have seen marriage of their parents.
To overcome this situation, bride/groom need to get positive support from their around people and should decide as to which piece of their parent’s marriage they should adopt and which not. Bride or groom can discuss this matter openly with their fiancé so that things work perfectly in future.
Do you really love your partner?
It’s time to question yourself that do you really love the person whom you’re getting married or if you’re truly willing to make this relation last for lifetime. If the answer is yes then no need to worry about any jitters but if the answer is no then you must figure it out otherwise this is going to ruin the lives of both peep.
Some Doubts of a bride:
Some future issues such as
How many kids my partner would want?
Where does he would want to live?
How much money does he plan to make?
How will we budget?
How much time will we spend together?
What if I got bored with him?
What if he stopped caring for me?
What if he put restrictions on me?
All these questions are mere doubts making you anxious for no reason. You should know that the person entering your life would be your partner in everything. Why would you get bore of him, question yourself that do you get bore of your parents or siblings in spite of living with them for year? Same is the case with marriage. This relationship is meant to be last for years.
Other questions can be solved by mutual discussion and understanding, remember that understanding each other ‘views is the key to keep relations strong.Be optimistic and let the positive vibes touch you.
Some doubts of a groom:
What will happen to my personal space?
Change of routine?
It’s normal for grooms to think that their forth coming wedding would change their daily routines and life style and those they might need to compromise or sacrifice on few things for which they might not be ready yet.
How will I accomplish all that financial responsibility?
After marriage, man becomes responsible for the lady’s all financial needs. Financial responsibility is a great responsibility which might make man anxious if he’s not able to fulfill it as it can be the reason of future fights.
Will I become source of trouble between my mother and wife?
This happens that wife and mother have differences and small fights over the husband’s attention and money. He needs to maintain balance between these two relations.
Will my wife be just the way I want her to be?
Will I be able to live up to my partner’s expectations?
Groom needs to understand that getting married doesn’t mean that one needs to be perfect. Rather it’s about perfect relationship that both persons will develop.
Just as you’re anxious about the expectations of your bride, your bride would also be feeling the same. Just, share the expectations among yourselves as you’re not alone in this journey.
Ways to handle pre wedding jitters:
Chill out With Your Closest Friend
Tension is a devouring feeling, one that can really change the way you feel about different parts of your life. In case you’re restless about going up before all of individuals at the wedding, it can make you ponder marriage. So enjoying a reprieve from the wedding arrangements and sit some place and chill out with your friends. It is an incredible approach to decrease the anxiety that wedding causes, and help you recover some clarity in your occupied life.
Stay in the moment
Make an effort not to harp on what may happen tomorrow. Keep yourself concentrated on today and the current workload. On the off chance that you are fixating on whether your wedding outfit will fit, quit stressing and go work out. Stay in the minute and do what you can today to get prepared for what is impending.
Carry on with your life
Try not to lose yourself and your feeling of who you are. Take a look at the difficulties you confront together and independently. Consider your companions, his companions and the companions you make together. Discuss every issue with your partner and don’t hesitate.
When is it the time to call off the wedding?
If you find any of the below mentioned acts, don’t ignore your gut feeling and call off the wedding:
- Ill-use: physical or passionate
- Compulsion: medications, liquor, or betting
- Genuine family issues: parental dissatisfaction or conflict
- Religion: clashing convictions that can’t be determined
- Future generations: diverse arrangements for having kidsSexual introduction: your partner’s inclinations are not quite the same as what you were persuaded.